True love,
A feeling I have
never really
experienced in reality.

I have felt love,
love that
feels so very true,
But what does
"in love"
mean when
it isn't real?

That person,
him
so many times
I feel

like I would give
the whole world
for him
Like all I
ever want
is him.

To be with him,
to feel that he is real,
to love someone
I can see,
someone I
Can talk to
and not make up
the words as I go along.

Someone
Real,
flesh and bone,
3d, self-thinking
But still exactly
as he is in my mind.

Other times I kick myself
I know what
is best for me,
best to give it
up and make a
life for myself instead
of weeping over
someone
imaginary.

So much of me,
though,
is devoted,
wants so much to
continue loving
the person who
can never be.

That part, such a
huge part,
is the part that screams
to me,

Screaming to never
let him go, out of fear
that if I loosen even a
little,
that I will abandon him
completely.

I wish I could,
like normal people.
Accept the fact
and move on.
If anything, I would give
it all to leave him behind,
and I so desperately
want to.

But the problem,
Love.

I don't quite understand how,
but love is the Chain
of Command that
holds me back,
making me
-plead to him,
-cry to him,
the master of my heart.